I don't know about everyone else, but I tend to have the same doubts about myself and my abilities over and over again. It's a constant struggle. Questions plague me all the time like if I am a good enough dad for my kids and if I really have what it takes to be the rock I need to be for them. Questions like do I really have enough talents and spirituality to teach 100 teenagers every day. Do I have what it takes to really fulfill my calling? Self doubts are constant and pressing. They are one of the banes of my existence.
Everyone has them I suppose, and I think it is a fairly serious matter to determine how to deal with them. Tonight I just tried to focus on the good. When the kids had destroyed the kitchen, I just thought of how grateful that I am that they are here and healthy. I will miss the messes even though they drive me crazy. Even though I am tired I know I will miss when my daughter wanted me to snuggle with her at bedtime. I know I will miss those things and seeing them in their true light as tender mercies from a loving God helps me realize that despite my inadequacies that this is my reality and that God has entrusted me with these responsibilities, so I should enjoy them!
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